Sean

“There’s a lot of weird stuff going on these days. People are protesting so they can get haircuts, rumors are spreading of a dead North Korean leader, and experts are assuring us that the worst is still yet to come. But I think the strangest thing about the time we live in now is how normal it’s already beginning to feel. I’ve recently been thinking a lot about that word: “normal,’ and how a term so seemingly grounded and steady can have its definition flipped on its head in an instant. Right now, I feel normal, even with the knowledge that the world will never be the same again. I will not have had a regular education. I will not have had a regular graduation (don’t even get me started on this oncoming job search). And so, I’m stuck here during quarantine, as so many others are, fluctuating between being happy for what I had and feeling cheated for what I was never given.

I feel like that duality was kind of the thesis of my last week at school for all of the seniors. When we first got the news thanks to a faculty email that was leaked to the student body telling us we had to leave by Monday, people were confused, then scared, then said f*** it, and went wild. That Wednesday and Thursday were filled with frantic energy. Pushed for time, my a cappella group and improv group had impromptu final shows back to back. Those two nights, I went to some of the most well-attended parties of my college career. Everyone, especially the seniors, pulled out all the stops to end this thing with a bang.

And then things started to change. Friday brought with it a tension as students started to buy plane tickets home, with some wondering where they would even go after getting kicked out. Cafeteria conversations became littered with words like “packing,” “storage,” and “goodbye.” There were still parties that night, but they were smaller and mostly for intimate friends. By Saturday, that tension had sunk into gloom. The thought that best friends may not see each other for quite some time weighed on everyone. Street parking disappeared as parents drove in to pack up their kids and drive back to probably just outside of Boston. Not a lot of people went out that night. I didn’t, at least. Like the rest of my suite, I left on Sunday. While the car drove away to Stowe, where I would finish filming my thesis, I almost had to plug my ears as the campus rang with the loudest silence I’ve ever heard.

But I am lucky, especially so. I have a family that I get along with, a roof over my head, and food to eat.  And, if I’m being honest, the quarantine has brought some positives along with the countless negatives. For one, I’m in Miami freaking Florida, which, even with the countless mosquitos hounding me at all hours, is not a bad place to be. I’ve also gotten extra time to work on my thesis, time that I now see was very much needed in order to finish. All in all, I’m happy that my dread has not been able to outweigh my hope for things to change, if not back to normal, then to at least better than before.”